


Do you want to be bros?

by arsonandhockeysticks



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Bromance, M/M, no beta we die like men, some shitty POV
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-27
Updated: 2020-04-27
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:27:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,926
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23869012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arsonandhockeysticks/pseuds/arsonandhockeysticks
Summary: Ransom and Holster get bored and decide that they want to get married, they ask Shitty to officiate the wedding.
Relationships: Adam "Holster" Birkholtz/Justin "Ransom" Oluransi, Eric "Bitty" Bittle/Jack Zimmermann, Larissa "Lardo" Duan/Shitty Knight
Comments: 2
Kudos: 22





	1. Chapter one

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Inconvenient_or_less](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Inconvenient_or_less/gifts).



> I think the bromance between these two is perfect. Also, this is my first fic, so bare with me. I'm trying my best.

_At the reception after the wedding of Jack Zimmermann and Eric "Bitty" Bittle_

Holster wandered up to Ransom. He slapped a hand on Ransom's shoulder. 

“Hey bro.” Ransom looked up, “Can I ask you a question?” 

“Ya bro, sure what is it?” Ransom was intrigued. Holster usually never asked before he asked him a question. The only times he did was when it was something big, like when Holster asked if Ransom wanted to move in with Shitty and Lardo in Boston. 

“Well, I know this is sudden but, do you want to get married?” Holster fidgeted a bit with his cuff. 

“Sure. It’s not like we get that many girls anyways, they all think we are gay.” 

“That was my main reason too!” They high-fived. “My other reason is you are Canadian and, well, it seems like it is a good time to have the ability to get out of the United States.” 

“Canada is the best country in the world bro. I am sure that you are not the only one who wants to be canadian, I mean who doesn’t?” Ransom said. He really was very proud of his home country. Ransom looked over to Holster. “When do you want to get married?” 

“Uh… it really doesn’t matter to me that much bro.” Holster replied. In an off hand manner Holster asked, “Isn't Shitty a lawyer?”

“He will be a real lawyer in like a month. Why?” Ransom was a bit confused by how the conversation was going. First, Holster proposed to him and now he is asking if Shitty is a lawyer. Holster should know that Shitty’s graduation from law school is in a few weeks. They do live in the same haus for fucks sake. 

“That is great!” Holster exclaimed. 

“Uh… and why exactly is that great bro?” Ransom asked. This conversation had really gotten away from him. He could normally follow the way that Holster’s mind worked, but right now, Ransom was completely lost. Like more lost than Jack in a kitchen. 

“Because he can do the wedding for us.” Holster explained. Ransom was starting to see where Holster was going. 

“Don’t you mean that he can officiate the wedding for us bro?” Holster noded. “Dude, we should go ask him now. That would be so cool!” 

“I know right, bro?”

The two bros wandered off into the crowd of the wedding reception in search of Shitty. 

Shitty had just popped one of the really good mini pies that Bitty had made for the cocktail hour when Ransom and Holster walked up to him. Shitty swallowed. 

“Hey guys.” Shitty greeted the two men as they stopped before him. “What’s up?” 

“Um… ya,” Ransom said, “We have a rather important question to ask you.” 

“Ask a head.” 

_ This better be fun.  _ Shitty thought.  _ Really fun.  _ And then Shitty took a long draft from his beer. 

“So we wanted to ask you if you wanted to.” Holster said.

“Officiate our wedding” Ransom finished the sentence for Holster. 

Shitty spit the beer he had just taken a drink from everywhere. And then Shitty started to splutter and swear very loudly and very creatively. Shitty had gotten to the point of swearing where he was using curses the only he knew. By the time that Shitty started to wind down. They were getting some very weird looks. Bitty started to move towards his three former teammates. As soon as he got close enough to ask if everything was okay, Shitty had calmed down enough to answer in a slightly reasonable manner. 

“Is everything ok here y’all?” Bitty asked. He seemed concerned about Shittys sanity. 

“Everything is not ok here Bits.” Shitty said. “Holster and Ransom here just asked me to officiate at their wedding. So, yes nothing is ok! I pride myself on a fabulous gaydar.” Shitty glared at everybody. “Oi, Lardo, stop laughing it's not funny!” 

Lardo was doubled over with laughter, she straightened and wiped the corners of her eyes with the back of her hand. 

“Shitty, it is really funny! You never saw that Ransom and Holster are gay because they are not!” Lardo continued to laugh. 

Shitty looked at Holster and Ransom. 

“It’s true,” Ransom said. 

“We are not gay.” Holster finished.

Shitty was even more confused than ever at this point. He had no clue what was going on here. Marriage is not something that people, especially two bros do on a whim. Shitty was wondering if everyone on his old team was crazy. Shitty didn't respect many things, marriage was one and weed and the Samwell Men's Hockey team by-laws were the others. 

“Ok, so why are the two of you even asking me to marry you?” 

Holster pointed a thumb at Ransom and said

“He has really good healthcare and a dual- citizenship could be really helpful right now.”

“Also,” Ransom added. “It's really hard to date when all the girls already think that we are gay, so its just easier this way.” 

“Oh sweeties!” Bitty said, “I am so happy for y’all! I hope that you two will be happy together.” 

“So, Shits.” Jack said “I take it that you will be officiating the wedding of Holster and Ransom here.” 

“I think i am.” Shitty said. He was still very much in shock. 

Holster was surprised by how well Ransom had taken his proposal. He knew that Ransom had given up on finding girls to date and well, Holsters parents were pressuring him to get married so he did the first thing that came to his mind. Well, not the first thing that came to mind. He had thought about proposing before he did it, a little.

“Oh, Holster, you did the impossible.” Jack said. “You broke Shitty. I have only seen that once and that was scary.” 

“I am impressed by you bro.” Ransom said. “Actually, I am also impressed with myself as well. I did have a hand in that.” 

The two bros fist bumped and grinned at each other. 

“This will definitely go down in the Samwell Men’s Hockey history books.” Holser said. 

“Wait,” Ford had just walked up to the group. “You have history books? And why have i never seen it?” 

Holster and Ransom looked at each other. 

“Should we tell them about it, Holster?” Ransom said. 

“Why not Ransom, maybe they can add to it.” Holster said. 

“Ooh, good point.” 

“Ok, so,” Holster said. “The Samwell Men’s Hockey Team History book is a project we have been working on since our freshman year.” 

“We have been recording everything of interest that happens to the hockey team in it.” Ransom said. “In case you wanted to know, Jack has his own chapter.” 

“Why am I not surprised by that?” Dex said. 

“Because he is fabulous.” Nursery said. 

Holster was a bit startled by Dexs appearance as well that of Chowder, Nursery and Tango. How had he not noticed when the four boys joined the group. He tended to notice people especially when the people are large hockey players. 

“And that,” Bitty said. “Is something that we can all agree on.” then bitty stretched up on his toes and kissed Jack on the cheek. 

“Can i see this book?” Ford asked “I am fascinated by it.” 

“Sure!” Holster said. 

“We will even make you a copy” Ransom said. 

_ A few weeks later  _

“Ok, so the two of you want to have a hockey themed wedding yes?” Bitty asked. He and Lardo were helping Ransom and Holster organize their wedding. 

“Yes, we want a hockey wedding with an after kegster.” Holster clarified. 

Lardo looked a bit skeptical, “Are you sure you want a kegster at your wedding? You know your families are going to be at the wedding too.” 

“Ya well, then we will have the kegster after the reception then instead of the reception.” Random said. 

“And your families will be invited to that?” Ford asked.

“Not all of them, but some of the younger ones, yes.” Holster answered. 

“Ok that's good, now all we need to do is plan pretty much everything else for the entire wedding.” Lardo said, her tones dripping with sarcasm. 

“Well, it is really not that hard.” Bitty said. “I should know, I did plan my entire wedding with Jack.” 

“Really?” Holster said. “I’m surprised that he let you do all of it. Did he have a say in the guest list?”

“Yes.” Bitty said laughing, “That and the location were the only things I let him do. Why are both of you doing this anyways? 

“The reason we are both here is because we are bros.” Ransom said. 

“And Bros stick together.” Holster finished 

“That’s like the first rule on the bro code, right?” Lardo added. She meant it in a sarcastic manner but Ransom and Holster grinned at her like she had performed a magic trick. 

“Shitty trained her well.” Ransom commented. 

“I agree.” That was from Holster. 

The five of them were sitting at a table in the apartment that Ransom and Holster shared with Shitty, Lardo, and one other girl who seemed to hate everyone. She especially Shitty and his penchant for walking around the house, or as the four from Samwell called it, The Haus 2.0, in nothing but his underwear and sometimes even less. As Ransom and Holster could well attest, the sight was very scaring. It is not something for the faint of heart.

Bitty and Ford had driven up from Rhode Island for the weekend, Bitty from Providence and Ford from Samwell. Laedo had decided that Ransom and Holster needed a planning committee for their wedding. It had been an eminently good move on Lardo’s part, otherwise, there wouldn't have been much of a wedding. Ransom and Holster could organize a hockey team. But a wedding was beyond even their skills. They also thought that having the wedding at the rink was smart, so no one could really tell if they needed help or not. 

They were most of the way done with planning the decor when Ransom asked,

“Hey, could we have the wedding be both hockey and Canada themed?”

At that moment Jack walked into the kitchen, “I think that is an absolutely amazing idea. Our country needs so much more love and honor and respect.” 

“It is the native land of the majestic moose, the producer of the world's best maple syrup and the home of the best well, everything.” Ransom added. He got offended when people didn’t believe that he was from Canada because he is black. It's like they never heard of imagration.

Lardo broke the spell. “Ok dudes, now that our canada appreciation moment is over, let’s get back on topic, “Holster, are you ok with a canadian themed wedding?” 

Holster nodded, in a very fancy manner. His stoic effect was ruined by his glasses falling down his nose, much to the amusement of all. 

The theme they ended up going with was hockey but all the decorations were in the red and white from the canadian flag. There were also candian flags just randomly around. 

  



	2. Chapter two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In this chapter, the bros get married. Canada is mentioned more than a few times in this chapter. If you are afraid of Canada, I would not suggest reading the rest of the fic.

The day of the wedding- morning 

“Hey bro,” Holster called out, “Have you seen my glasses? I can’t find them.” 

Ransom and Holster were getting ready in their respective bedrooms at the Haus 2.0 before the wedding. Most of the SMH had spent the night at the Haus, the few who didn’t joined the rest in the morning. Lardo had decided that if the day was to work right, she needed to be incharge of everything,and much to the amusement of all, she treated the wedding and its preparations like it was just a big hockey game. 

Shitty wandered into Holsters room, “Have you checked on whatever book you were last reading Holtz?” 

The glasses were in fact serving as a bookmark in a copy of ‘The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy’. 

“Thanks Shitty, I don't know what i would do without you.” Holster said.

Shitty slapped his arm. “Hey don’t get all sentimental at me, save it for Ransom.” 

Holster laughed, put on his glasses and grabbed his bow tie and started to tie it. 

“SHITTY!” 

“Well,” Shitty said, “Ransom appears to need my help.” and he then proceeded to hurry out of the room, into the hall and into Ransom’s room. 

“Hey bro,” Shitty greated Ransom. “What do you need my help with?

Ransom’s room was decked out in Canadian flags and hockey Paraphernalia, it really did resemble its owner. Ransom appeared to be struggling to do something at his wrist. 

“Umm, ya Shitty, i.- Uh need help with my euh cuff links.” 

Shitty walked over to Ransom. He grabbed Ransom's wrist and then did the cuff link.

Shitty had been surprised when Ransom and Holster asked him to officiate at their wedding. Shitty was as Lardo described broken. He had managed to wrap his head around the fact that the two people on the hockey team he thought the least likely to get married were getting married. He couldn’t tell who was more excited, Ransom and Holster or Bitty. Shitty was leaning towards Bitty.

“So, Ransom, are you ready for your wedding?” Jack asked, he and Bitty had just gotten to the Haus. 

“Uh- i think so- euh do you have any advice?” Ransom asked, “Like since you are married.”

“Since I have no experience with the married state, I will leave you Canadians to it. Also, I don't want to ruin your heart to heart by being to American ” Shitty said and then left. That left Jack and Ransom standing rather awkwardly in the middle of Ransom's room. For a long moment they just stood there and then they started laughing. 

“Um well,” Jack said. “Do you have your vows written?” 

“Yes. I am afraid that Holszy will have the same ones though.” Ransom sounded rather nervous, the only other time Jack had heard him sound like that was when Holster and Shitty had tricked him into thinking that there were ghosts in the Haus at Samwell. Ransom was very serious about ghosts. 

“Well, what are your vows about?” Jack asked, 

“They are about how we met and became instant best friends.” Ransom answered. 

“Ransom, i don't think you need to worry about that, even if the vows are the same, it would still be you.” Jack posed for a moment, “Actually, if your vows are the same it would be very Ransom and Holster.” 

“Oh good.” Ransom said. 

“Yes.” Jack agreed. 

“Jac-” Ransom started. 

“Rans-” Jack stared, 

They looked at each other a bit embarrassed for talking over the other. 

“Jack, you can go.” Ransom said. 

“No,” Jack protests. “That would be rude, you can go first.” 

“No, you go, you are the guest.” 

“You should go first Ransom, it's your wedding today.”  
“Jack, you started talking first, you should go.” 

“Ransom. Go.” 

“Alright you two,” Lardo cut off Jack and Ransoms politeness contest. “This isn’t the time for seeing who is more canadian. You can do that later, maybe tomorrow.” 

“Oh sorry” they two of them were tripping over each other to apologise to Lardo. 

“I get that you are both from Canada, but do you need to be so blatantly Canadian about it?” Lardo asked. “I mean if I wanted this much Canadianness, I would just go to Canada.”

“Lardo, they can’t help it.” Bitty said from the door. “They are Canadians.” 

“I suppose you are right Bitty.” Lardo said. 

“I do tend to be.” Bitty replied. “Right sweetie?” 

“Uhh- I guess so.” Jack replied.

“Good!” Bitty clapped his hands together in excitement. “Are y’all ready to head to the rink?” 

“I think I am,” Ransom answered. 

“Ok, so Ransom will be coming with Jack, Tango, Dex and me.” Bitty was corralling everyone in the room. “Lardo, you and Shitty are taking Holster, Nursery and Chowder? Yes?” Everyone nodded and Bitty continued on, “Good, so Jack, Ransom and I are heading out now. Lardo, when are you leaving?” 

“As soon as we are ready, which, probably will be some time given that Shitty has just started on his ‘stach care routine.” Lardo said.

“Ok, so Lardo, do you have an estimate on how long it will take Shitty to do his mustach?” Bitty asked. 

“Probably about fifteen of twenty minuets before he is even close to ready.” Lardo answered.

“That will have to work.” Bitty said, “Let’s go.” 

Jack, Bitty, Tango, Dex and Ransom headed out of the door. Lardo walked into the living room to check on the remaining members of the hockey team. For the most part, everyone was up and dressed and ready to go to the rink. 

Before the ceremony at the rink

Ok, it's ok. You are ok, everything will be fine. I’ll be ok. Nothing will be wrong. I’m fine.  
This and several other panicked affirmations run through Holsters head. He isn’t sure why he is so nervous. It's not that he even wants to marry Ransom romanticly, he just wants to spend his life with his best friend. 

You are not the first person ever to marry your best friend. Jack and Bitty did that. There are no ghosts in this rink,  
Holster wasn’t the only one panicking, Ransom was as well. He is sitting with his siblings in the opposing team's locker room waiting for the wedding to start. He is surprisingly nervous. The only other time that he remembers being this nervous was when he went to his first time at hockey practice at Samwell, and that went very well. It went so well that one of the people he met then is now going to be his husband.  
Well, let’s go get this done. It’s not like this is something that will change my entire life. 

“Hey Ransom, you ok right?” 

Ransom lifts his head from his hands. Standing above him is Ford. She smiles down at him. When planning for the wedding, Ford was a god send. Her experience being on crew in theater really helped with the wrangling of a bunch of jocks and their friends. 

“Ya Ford, I’m ok, or at least i think i will be after the wedding.” Ransom answers. 

“That’s good, now put on your skates.” Ford had decided that the best plan of action for dealing with panicking hockey bros was ordering them around. 

“I’m doing that now Ford.” Ransom smiles. 

“I will go check on Holster now.” Ford said and then she walked out of the locker room. 

Shitty’s palms started to sweat. He was confused about why he is nervous. It’s not like it's his wedding. He is just officiating it. 

“Why is this so fucking nerve wraking Lards?” Shitty asked. “I need to go juul.” 

“Shitty, you are not going to ruin Holsters and Ransom’s wedding by being high for the ceremony!” Lardo was also more than a little nervous. She was worrying over every last detail.

“Uhh.. fine,” Shitty concedes. “I’m just worried that I will mess up the entire wedding and their entire life will be ruined!” 

“Whow, Shits calm down.” Lardo said. “You will do fine. You went to law school for fucks sake!” 

That seemed to work. Shitty appeared to be back to normal. 

“Umm… Uh Bitty?” 

“Yes, Holster?” Bitty responded,

“Did you also panic before your wedding?” Holster askes

“Oh sweety! You know that I panicked. You were there.” Bitty said. 

“I know that Bitty, it’s just that I'm more nervous than I expected. Like I didn’t expect to be nervous at all.” 

“Neither did I” 

“Ok you fucks!” Shitty shouted as he walked into the locker room. “The time for the heart to heart is over! Let's get this wedding started!” with that noisy statement, Shitt stroded out of the room. 

“Well, that was fun.” Bitty said. “But he is right, it is time for you to get out there” 

“Uhh. ok, let’s get going. It’s not like I have another option.” 

Holster and Bitty laugh and head out to the hallway to get onto the ice. 

The wedding ceremony. 

The ceremony took place at center ice. A podium had been placed on it. The guests were sitting in folding chairs on the ice with an alse up the center. 

“Alright ladies and gentlemen and anybody here who’s not either of those, welcome to the wedding of my two favorite bros, Adam Birkholtz and Justin Oluransi, or as they are most commonly known, Holster and Ransom.” Shitty said, his voice booming over the arena loudspeakers. 

Holster was the first one to skate up the aisle. He skated to a stop in front of Shitty. Holster was wearing a dark red jacket over a white shirt with black pants. 

Next up were Tango, Nursery, Dex, Chowder, Lardo, Jack and Bitty, who were the groomsmen and Lardo for Holster and Ransom. 

Ransom skated up the aisle last. In a black jacket with a white shirt and dark red jacket, he was wearing almost the opposite of Holster. 

“Today, I am proud, very proud and honored to be officiating this wedding. This wedding is one that none of us had ever seen coming. But even if it was unexpected, it is one that we are all happy to witness.” Shittys voice was calm and steady. His former nervousness had all but disappeared. “Now let’s get the business part of the wedding over. So, do you, Adam Birkholtz, take Ransom to be your bro for the rest of your life?” 

“I do.” 

“And do you, Justin Oluransi, take Hoster to be your lifelong bro?” Shitty asked. 

“I do.” 

“Now, it’s time for you two to exchange your vows of broness, and whatever other mushy stuff the two of you want to say to each other.” Shitty said. “Ransom, do you want to go first?” 

“Um, yes I’ll go I suppose.” Ransom answered. “Holster, you are my favorite person in the whole world. As soon as I met you at our first practice freshman year, we were instant best friends. I have never met a person who is more like a brother to me, and I have two sisters, but I am closer to you than I am to them. You have helped me so much in the time I’ve known you. Holtzy, you are my bro and I love you for that.” 

Ransom’s speech had almost the entire audience tearing up. Bitty was actually crying softly into Jack’s shoulder. 

“Wow my dude,” Shitty broke the silence after Ransom’s speech. “That was really touching. And Holster, do you have anything to say to that.” 

“I do have something to say to that.” Holster replied. “Ransom, you are the best person I know. You are always there for me. You always find my glasses and you are always there to back me up. I have played hockey with other people on my line, but you are by far my favorite person to play with. When I play hockey with you, I am better than I am with anyone else.” Holster posed for a moment because he was choking up. Then he went on, “I love you bro, you are the only person I could want to spend my life with.” 

“And now,” Shitty said, “With the power invested in me by the state of Massachusetts, I now pronounce you bros,” At this, everyone in the arena laughed. “Holster, Ransom,” Shitty looked between the two, “You may now fist bump your bro.” 

Ransom and Holster fist bumped. 

“Bros forever?” Ransom asked. 

“Bros forever.” Holster answered. 

The two bros hugged. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading my first attempt at a fic! I hope that you like it. I had a lot of fun writing it.


End file.
